THE SPICE IS RIGHT: Take 5 – NewRegional

THE SPICE IS RIGHT: NewRegional

It’s getting cold outside, boys and girls, so how about a little spice to heat up your life? We’ve gathered the blogger roundtable for one final time in 2018 to do a little crystal ball gazing and fiery hot take…ing for you. Each blogger has given a hot take about the upcoming spring season, and all of the other bloggers are here to sample the spice, and give their reviews. Was the take too spicy? Not spicy enough? Just right? We’ll be heading into winter mode pretty shortly, but we’ll try to start hitting up season previews beginning next month, and running a couple per week until teams are back from Winter Break. Today we have our newest member, and he’s bringing what is likely the hottest take of this entire series!

NEWREGIONAL’s (aka Spice Cream Sandwich’s) take:
The ITA rankings will NEVER be posted late OR with spelling mistakes ALL. SPRING. LONG.

AVZ: I am not going to waste my time on a take that we don’t really know who the mistake lies with. Is it the ITA or is it the coaches who submit their regional rankings. My guess is it’s the latter so for the coaches who read this, step up your game. The Spelling Bee is now on ESPN so it’s basically equal to tennis. Let’s set the bar low here and say that on time is the goal. On time and correct spelling gets a gold star.

NE: WOAH! This take is a burning thing, but it will leave a familiar sting, setting us up with something we all desire, this take belongs in our honorary Ring of Fire. Does the new guy have some sort of pull or something because this seems like a hot take you could only make with some flaming insider information. This is probably the most outrageous thing anybody has said so far in this series, and that includes the following sentence, “This Hendecagon of Truth is an oasis of milk quietly hidden amidst the chaos of spice.” I hope NewRegional has some data to back this up, because I would be shocked if there has been a single year in the past decade without at least one mistake…

RegNEC: Stop, drop, and roll, because this take might cause you to spontaneously combust .

DIIIWest: Think of your typical Scoville scale, well this take doesn’t belong anywhere on it as this is toooo hotttt. There will always be without a doubt in my mind a spelling/grammar mistake each time rankings are posted. Obviously not a whole lot of effort or care are put into the posts (my apologies to whoever’s job that is, I hope you don’t read this!). Anyways, this is as certain as Djokovic passing both Nadal and Federer in Grand Slam count by his retirement making him the best of all time… (Yes, I just said that and boy did that just open up a whole new can of worms I think).

RegAS: I’m never going to be able to feel my tongue again. This is just ludicrous. Since the dawn of time, back when AVZ used to play, the rankings have been late and have had many typos. I don’t see any reason why this would change. I want whatever NewReg is on.

AS: This is just straight up delusional spice. I don’t think this spice has ever been tasted by anyone in the world, it simply doesn’t exist. We need robots to create this level of spice because it’s another that simply won’t happen. The ITA Rankings are always effed up and there’s just nothing that will stop them from putting minimal effort into making a reasonable rankings experience for us.

NewCentral: Emma Bunton coming through with heat that flips the baby spice moniker to MONSTROUS Spice. There’s about five or six rankings sets that the ITA will release, and it’s more likely than not that all of the releases will be delayed with spelling mistakes. This take might very well be our hottest take because there’s literally zero chance that this happens – until the ITA proves me wrong or gives The Blog a seat at the ranking committee table I can’t see a set of rankings coming out on time without error. This is the Last Dab, and I’ll even go so far as to put my own tongue on the line, by promising to try the last dab should the ITA prove me wrong with on time rankings free of typos for 2019.

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